I’ve been told that success is about, ‘liking yourself, liking what you do and liking how you do it.’ On some level many of us have probably mastered how to manage our lives in order to ‘get by’ or better still ‘do well’. But how adept are we at achieving personal success in all realms of life? Lisa Durante explores how leveraging emotional intelligence can reap immeasurable fulfilment overall.
You May Have To Take More Than One Test To Win The Game
Everyone is dealt different hardships and blessings in life and whilst it may seem that life is biased in her dealings, we each are given the exact hand designed to teach us the lessons required for our unique journey. Effectively this means that there are no failures, but merely challenges to be overcome on the road to self-actualisation. It is only the imaginary ‘demons’ that are unconquerable. The key to recognising what you can change and what you cannot is Emotional Intelligence (EI), also known as Emotional Quotient (EQ). Emotional Intelligence (EI) refers to the ability to perceive, control, and evaluate emotions. Some researchers suggest that emotional intelligence can be learnt and strengthened, while others claim it is an inborn characteristic.
Don’t Let What You Cannot Do Interfere With What You Can
Irrespective of how smart you are, physically fit, how hard you work and how sincere you may be in your intentions, many people still move through life by simply going along with the current, letting outside forces determine their direction. Don’t feel dejected. Everyone goes down that route (to some extent). You are not alone. It is natural to unconsciously recreate what is familiar until we choose something better. Once we do, that’s when emotional intelligence flourishes.
To Accomplish Great Things, We Must Not Only Act, But Also Dream; Not Only Plan, But Also Believe
Whether it’s overcoming entrenched negative mind-sets, coping with politics at home or in the workplace, challenges with children, spouses or clients; or managing a tenuous life-work balance, staying open to the process of learning the ‘best way forward’ is uncomfortable. It is just like increasing muscle mass through weight bearing exercise. It only comes through hard work. Rarely do things come effortlessly to those who don’t endevour.
Transformational Truth 1
A human being is a part of a whole, called by us a universe, a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings as something separated from the rest … a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty.
– Albert Einstein
Transformational Truth 2
There are two basic motivating forces: fear and love. When we are afraid, we pull back from life. When we are in love, we open to all that life has to offer with passion, excitement, and acceptance. We need to learn to love ourselves first, in all our glory and our imperfections. If we cannot love ourselves, we cannot fully open to our ability to love others or our potential to create. Evolution and all hopes for a better world rest in the fearlessness and open-hearted vision of people who embrace life.
– John Lennon
Twenty Years From Now You Will Be More Disappointed By The Things That You Didn’t Do Than By The Ones You Did
Achieving and sustaining success depends on how you choose to act or react in any given situation. Jealousy, frustration, anger and fear are all emotional by-products of perceived situations that have gone awry and many of us are addicted to these negative thought-pattern but we need not be. Empathy, patience, optimism and equanimity can be chosen instead as alternative responses to the inevitable vicissitudes caused by people and situations. It takes practice, but I’ve found that it works if you work it. However, even if a positive outlook and behaviour is cultivated, that does not imply a perennial ‘bed of roses’. In every context of life, we are constantly challenged and even when a positive course of action is chosen, instant resolution of issues is not automatic. It is only by being ‘comfortable’ with being ‘uncomfortable’ – with understanding that nothing is perfect–and that happiness is fleeting that self-awareness and contentment evolves. This realisation opens the door to acceptance which ultimately guides us towards enlightenment. It is by gradually overcoming life’s challenges and embracing inner strengths of an individual that self-actualisation – or success – is actually manifested.
You’ve Got To Get Up Every Morning With Determination If You Want To Go To Bed With Satisfaction
Being successful requires us to awaken and be present in our own lives, aligning ourselves with our greatest destiny and mapping out the way. It is so easy to be enveloped by the relentless ‘gravitational pull’ of the world and its myriad distractions. We must consciously select a path that facilitates the awakening of our awareness, both individually and collectively. Sounds too idealistic? This is how it’s achieved… People rarely succeed unless they have fun from what they are doing . Everything in life is interconnected. As we evolve, our relationships, work and lives blossom. We attract like-minded people and learn to foster intimacy and meaningful relationships. And, alternatively as we are impacted by these relationships and our work, we evolve and learn to respect ourselves more and more.
Motivation Is What Gets You Started. Habit Is What Keeps You Going
Professionals in every field will tell you that psychological wellbeing and career success are really two sides of the same coin. We can only be abundant in love, health, opportunities and money if we are conscious, balanced and grateful for the cards that we are already being dealt. Agonising about the past, fretting about the present and stressing about the future are the triad of behaviours that eschew the growth of emotional intelligence.
Take up one idea. Make that one idea your life – think of it, dream of it, live on that idea. Let the brain, muscles, nerves, every part of your body, be full of that idea, and just leave every other idea alone. This is the way to success.